Free-write Saturday!

hand writing painfulThe following is a free-write (where you write whatever comes to your mind, no matter what…) I chucked out this morning. This was supposed to be a brain-dump, but I felt it was viable enough to post. Plus, I needed to breathe some posting life back into this blog. Here goes!:

The brain is a complex and ridiculous machine. I wonder sometimes who operates mine. Is it me? Some cosmic entity pulling puppet strings? Or is it just random thoughts bombarded by a careless and chaotic universe?

I’m sure I’ll never answer that one. heck, I have a difficult time simply figuring out what I’m going to attempt to accomplish in the next moment.

The next moment, now there’s a concept I struggle with often. how to stay in the “now” without projecting or reminiscing about the past. I so seldom appear capable of staying in the moment, except possibly when I’m writing.

I often slip into writing effortlessly. Of course, I don’t force writing very often. In fact, I cannot remember the last time I forced writing to happen. These days, I’m usually chomping at the pen to get some writing down.

There is a distinction between writing what I REALLY want to write and writing what NEEDS to be written. Boeth are satisfying to me, surprisingly, but writing for “me” brings the most peace.

When I deny my personal writing, I tend to get a bit off-kilter. I find myself despondent and prone to depression and discontentedness. Of course, when I write for “me”I tend to be writing my way out of those conditions. lol!

I suppose there is a direct correlation to those events. I’m sure I should explore them. Writing long-hand with a pen as I did in this exercise is amazing. I am much slower at kicking out words, but the flow is more comfortable. One of the cool aspects of writing by hand then keying into the computer is the edits seem stronger and cleaner.

There is also the “writer’s cramp” to deal with. I can key all day long, but  here, hand-writing on page three, I’m finding the unused writing  muscles are complaining loudly.

In a way, this is sad. Connection to words through a pen being stronger should drive me to hand-write more often. Especially since I don’t like most of what I write. Possibly, my satisfaction level with the finished product would increase if I just took the time to grab a pen and paper.

I should purchase some “brain-dump” journals and purge my mind each day. I likely would come up with some great blog posts as a side benefit. This free-write has been a lot of fun and I look forward to doing more along these lines in the future!

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